As I predicted silently when I started the blog, I've been a slacker. No post in over year, nice. But it's been a good year. The kiddo turned 9 and is as funny as ever. I'm still at the church, though doing something slightly different than when I first started. Was in a car accident last summer, and lost my dream car because of it. My theater addiction is in desperate need of a fix, I only did one show last year and I have nothing on the horizon sadly. Made it through the dating world alive and with a wonderful boyfriend to show for it. And I'm getting ready to start a weight loss program tomorrow. Life is good.
Ok, so about this weight loss....
I've always been fat. Well, since I hit puberty at the age of 10... so yeah, always. And even though weight is an issue, I've always thought of myself as pretty, sometimes beautiful. And it's not just me, if I had a dollar for overtime I've heard "But you have such a pretty face..." Yes, thank you, I'm fat, I understand. But I like my look, I love my eyes and I have a great smile and after many years of hating them, I've even come to terms with all my freckles. It's just time to loose the fat. All through high school and college I was a steady size 16 to 18, just on the other side of being able to shop in regular stores. As I've gotten older I've definitely been bigger than I am now, thanks to pregnancy and an unhealthy marriage. I'm glad to say that today is not the biggest I've ever been. I'm a big woman, I'm tall and I have broad shoulders and big feet and I've had to wear a bra since 4th grade. I'm never going to be a "skinny girl" and I don't want to be, I just want to look and feel better than I do. I want to be able to shop wherever. I want to go to Victoria's Secret for more than just perfume. I want to be able to climb stairs without getting out of breath. I want my daughter to be proud of me, not embarrassed because I'm fat (which she isn't but it's a fear of mine for the future). I don't want people to look at me and assume something about me because of my weight. I'm tired of being the fat girl.
So, I'm starting a medically supervised diet. I go tonight for the start up class and will begin the program tomorrow morning. I'm so excited! I'm really ready and I'm not going to fail! It's great because I had to meet with a nurse, get blood work done and then meet with the doctor (who interned with my grandfather, very cool). The great news is my blood work is great! I don't have any risk factors going on there, thank goodness. My blood pressure is high and that is a concern, but they feel that weight loss will dramatically change that. So because of my age and the fact that my blood work is so good, they don't think I'll need as much supervision as someone with my BMI should. My plan is to loose 60 pounds by June 7, 2012
So here are my starting stats today, January 18, 2012:
35 year old woman, 5'9"
246 pounds (I've never told anyone my weight)
BMI of 37
Blood pressure 170/90 (I told you it was high)
Here goes!!!
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